this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
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She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
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DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I FOUND THE LEGS
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
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