I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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