Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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