At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
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