Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize