There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
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