3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize