yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize