It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
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