Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
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