i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Randomize
