i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
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