I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
