I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
should my penis look like a turkey
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize