You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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