Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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