I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
pop tarts are not kleenex
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
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