I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
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