Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
