I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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