Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
You are a genius and a whore.
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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