How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Found the puke drawer
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
