We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
You called me at 2am singing 'happy birthday' while screaming 'I fucking love you' verses, all while eating a burrito and taking a piss off your apartment balcony
Yeah I know, the people below me already told me
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Randomize
