Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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