this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
