Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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