So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Randomize