Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Randomize
