Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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