Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Dear god my vagina.
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