Grow some girl-balls and come out already
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
