well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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