is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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