My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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