Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
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