We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
there is glitter all over my balls
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