he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Randomize