Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Randomize