i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize
