i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
