Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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