I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
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