I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
Randomize