hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
