what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
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