The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
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