don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Randomize
