and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize
