You smell like stripper and shame
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Randomize