i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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