i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
How external is "for external use only"?
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
